fumbling idiot pt 1

Its 11 pass 3am in Singapore... Bedtime for most Singaporeans but me... I cant sleep but thats ok its Friday & tomorrow is the weekend whooo pieeeeeeee... No plans as yet for tonight but maybe i would end going dancing like last week. Dancings fun makes me forget life for a while and allows me to escape to to a world of dance & music that feeds my soul... But before i can do that its off to work with my cute little brats at school. I think they are as excited as i am it being friday and all. heehe kids ... anyhow, Im sitting here bored well not really been journalling for the most part & writing poetry. Its amazing how inspiration comes when you feel you've made a complete idiot of yourself. How one giggly fun experience can make you feel so crappy and stupid or maybe the sensitivity bug did a biting job on me overtime .... hahaa .. anyways, i shouldnt take things too hard but more as constructive criticism or lifes lesson. Makes you a better person right?. I know im rambling - sometimes rambling helps you put things into perspective and a tried n tested method of a game of solitaire does the job too ...

being upfront honest often lands me in trouble ... some people like it yet others dont and i have in a hard way as well as an easy way that there is no way of pleasing everyone. I think i am so out to please everyone because i have done that my whole life... in other words living my life for others for the happiness and betterment of others and being from an Asian upbringing this would mean filial piety...its all about the family blah blah blah lol i know that probably sounds mean but sometimes you need to laugh it off - laugh at serious matters a little . when you've spent much of your life trying to make everyone else feel happy its kinda hard to actually do it for yourself .. i dont know maybe its just my conscience talking .. who knows. i suppose there are some things in life that you just cant make sense off but thats ok its really not the end of the world or is it?muahahahaha ...

oooooooo i just remembered today is evaluation results day .. seeing it didnt happen yesterday... tee hee oh oh .. stay cool stay confident :D .. blah bla blah .. Have you ever had one of those days when you are so tired so drained and you know you need to sleep but you just cant? GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR i am so having one of those moments yet my mind refuses to stop thinking i mean its a norm for my mind to function nonstop but tonight its over working itself lol .. its like so many things to do so little time to do it ...

yikes .. i am hearing a funny sound i think its coming from my motherboard...i wonder if an alien has landed in it ? or is my mind playing tricsks on me being tired and what not? communications just sucked for me this last week and i didnt i would have to apologize three times to the same person ... must be something terribly wrong with me hahaha .. i should probably just stay away until this mecury retograde phase passes cos i seem to be a fumbling around him lately and seriously i feel really stupid around him lately and i know i am far from that .. Maybe its just idiot week or bust ....either that or my smart brain cells are on a vacation somewhere leaving the stupid ones to take charge .. i hope they would return soon from their much needed vacation .............. hahaah ok im sooo rambling i better stop ...

i have a horrible headache two days now ...................grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...i think i am going to attempt to sleeep worst comes to worst ill be back here writing again which i dont mind really except i have to be up in oh about 4 hours or so ....