still in it ...

deny deny deny ...humming that to the tune of perhaps perhaps perhaps ........ i was talking to a friend today and we was just catching up on old times - him updating me on his current love situation - fiancee and what not .. nice to see people falling inlove and getting hitched - lord knows theres been a lot of that here lately ... -- im just a sucker for seeing two souls united in love - i am a die hard romatic i guess ... but anyways .. he asked me 'so are you in love'? hows the love life ? and knowing me my ultimate reply was 'hell no' & what love life .. lets face it what love life? hahaha anyways then he gave me that look - im like umm errr and i laughed so i told him ... well lets just say i am in love with the one that got away ........ he grinned - the one that got away huh must be a hell of a guy lol ... i just smiled at him and raised an eyebrow - bah! anyways .. i realized that i still am inlove in with 'c' - and i figured i was over it but i guess i wasnt .. hahah oh what fun lol and i of course mean it in a good way .. maybe i have been in denial this whole time not truly acknowledging how much i feel for him until a friend had to ask for me to admit it to myself .. i noticed that i am often apologetic about it when in actual fact i shouldnt be right? Its a natural and i am pretty sure i have my reasons for feeling the way i do for him ....