..Ummi . my mother

Ummi is the Arabic word for mother and that’s what I call my mom, Ummi … the most amazing woman I know. A woman with a heart a woman I love dearly more it seems with each passing there ..

My mom is the favorite of all my cousins first second third. In our household all our aunts are given the title ‘Ati’. There is Ati Pak, Ati Noor so and so forth. It’s the title Ati followed by their names. But my mom is the only one with the title “ati’ simply Ati and that for me shows me how she stands out.

I felt like writing about her because in recent weeks she has been like a beacon of hope and realization – her spirit seems to be shining through more than usual. Like most of the women of her generation and my grandmother’s generation, their fighting spirit is one to be admired. Her kindness, compassion and giving nature seem to shine through even more than ever. What I took for granted in her before was something I saw and admired and love her more in recent weeks. I look at her and think to myself wow that’s my ummi – she’s is truly an amazing person. Her appreciation for people and family is something she instills in me since I was little. Her forgiving nature. My mom is one tough cookie when it comes to affection and in reminding me that she loves me – but her action speaks louder more than words ever could. Sometimes id have to ask her to give me a kiss or a hug and she would resist but a little cajoling usually makes her come through J) see emotions don’t come easy for her but in so many little ways I know how much she loves me and that satisfies me ..

During iftar and when we are in the kitchen together, that is the time when we really get to talk to each other about basically anything life, love, cakes, food just about anything. She has fed my soul with much enlightment sometimes by mere words sometimes just her actions. She has made me laugh with her antics, and silliness even when I felt like being a brat heehee yeah some us get to be brats even at our age *grin*. She listens though sometimes she doesn’t agree she tries to understand. I think these days she been more than a mother to me. She is my best friend.

My mother is a hard worker and very strong willed. In spite of the good life she was born into and the good life she was married into, my mom remains a hard worker. When we were sitting down making cookies we talked and she was tired, she said to me you know when I was young I would make cakes from morning to night. I had so much strength then and your dad wouldn’t be happy ;)). He would say cant you stop making the cakes by evening time. She wasn’t happy when he said that last thing she needed after a long day was him nagging at her – I laughed and thought wow – I thought it was cute and yes they are a cute couple loving happy … match made in heaven.

Just for the record his words were out of love not anger. He supported her in her passion for baking even though he could support them both. I suppose he understood her love for it.

My mother loves baking and decorating and she took her love for that and made it into a business – something she has done for the past 50 years. She still makes them now though it tires her more than usual so that’s where I come in but this blog is about her so we can leave m out of it for now ;)). In making cakes, I have seen my mothers giving nature. How she sets aside say about 4 types of cakes and cookies for each of her remaining 5 siblings and the daughter of her late sister. Tired or not she will make it a point every year to make something for them free of charge of course and on top of that she gives away of the cakes to friends and this year my second cousins in Malaysia got a taste of her giving nature. They placed an order for cakes and cookies but she is giving it to them for free. It probably doesn’t seem like a big deal to some – but for someone who earns a living making cakes I think that was a kind to do – again reminding me how much she appreciates family.

While we were mixing the batter yesterday, I was standing there mixing and putting in spices – we were making kuih lapis (it’s a spice layered cake) one of her specialties, I felt like what I was doing was familiar. For a moment in time I felt like I was her I am not sure if that made any sense but for a moment I was her , my ummi and I recalled when as a little girl I would watch her mix the batter, bake the cake and she would let me try some of it – the batter that is. I was really happy .. and it felt good being her for that moment in time .. going back in time .. What an experience ….

What a Ramadan this has been for me and her. I saw so much in her and it seems I love her even more now than ever. Her sacrifices, her hard work, her dedication, her unconditional love ., her caring nature, her giving nature, her compassions and kindness… that’s the best stuff and im blessed she has it because I am blessed she is my Ummi … the biggest blessing ever ..